I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
Randomize
