Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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