I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
