so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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