My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
