her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
