My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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