normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
