i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
