Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize