the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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