I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
