You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
The Olympian is in my bed
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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