Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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