it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
