Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
