i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
