i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
