I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
