So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
