Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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