Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Randomize
