I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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