Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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