I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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