Will you blow on my dice?
Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
