So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
