I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Randomize