I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I woke up under a house in Key West
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
