He asked to "fluff my boner.."
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
