i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Randomize
