We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Jesus Christ, it's not like going swimming. You don't have to wait 20 minutes after you eat to suck a dick
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