not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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