Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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