he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
I just puked behind a tree outside work, then walked past my manager with puke in my hair. Man, I'm gonna miss this when I get a real job.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
