WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
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