Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
