god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
