found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
