well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
