eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Randomize