1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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