He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
thus making me awesome and them whores
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
