i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Some lady just walked up to me in the bar and proclaimed that I looked like a "shady motherfucker." Can't argue with that one.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
