Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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