I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
You left your phone here
Wait...
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
