Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Randomize
