what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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