And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Randomize
