Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
